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Sisterhood

Sisterly love. Since time immemorial, it has been the ultimate usurper of self-interest and ego. That bothersome, burdensome, stubbornly unyielding familial glue that binds us to our female siblings with the tenacity of Super Glue, but with ten times the messy residue. A bond that undermines our planned intentions to ignore and deliver a chilling (and in some instances, near lethal) dose of the silent treatment. Where most friendships would perish or at the very least suffer a blow, the sisterly connection prevails with the sheer doggedness of . . . well, a bitch.

Is that one too many analogies? Well, here’s a straight-laced summation to hopefully rein in the underlying meaning: sisters are a pain in our ass, but we love them still. And darn it, do they ever have an infuriating ability to salvage that which, quite honestly, you’d sometimes rather do away with. True, damage can be done and periods of silence imparted. I’ve gone weeks without speaking to my sisters, while living under the same roof—a shunning initiated by an event, which at the time I deemed unforgivable.

Undoubtedly, a borrowed-without-permission offense; which, according to the law EVERYWHERE, is considered theft unless committed by a sister, at which point it’s rendered negligible under the sisterly clause. And so, my sisters were “blacklisted,” after stealing some favorite possession, like a beloved pair of embroidered, flare-leg Brody jeans (a rage-at-the-time item, circa ’97) or my immaculately kept copy of the Miseducation of Lauryn Hill CD. Disclaimer: It may have actually been my copy of It’s My Life by Bon Jovi, but for the purposes of seeming credible, let’s claim it was the arguably more cool and legit lyricism of the divine Ms. Hill.

Finally, after months of tension and awkward exchanges during the inevitable, obligatory family gathering (i.e., Christmas), we called a truce after my older or younger sister complimented my hair. A neutral enough article (in that it was something they could not borrow) and thus deemed sufficient grounds for reconciliation.

Why is this? What is it that makes sisters immune from an unceremonious exclusion from our lives? On a personal level, I think there is an inherent love that binds us. My sisters are my life-long friends. The ones who, without seeing me for months or even years at a time, still know me best and have my mannerisms, habits, and nervous ticks memorized. Who, physically, do not resemble me, but nonetheless when we are grouped together are immediately pegged as my brethren based entirely on the uncanny similarities in our speech, posture, and dramatic hand gestures.

The same inexplicable tolerance may apply in general to any sibling dynamics, I’m not entirely sure having never had a brother, only a troupe of male cousins who were instructed by my aunts and uncles to “be nice to your relatives from the West Coast.” Whatever the case or cause, the sisterly bond prevails time and time again. And although there are moments when I bite my tongue till I borderline draw blood or down another glass of wine as a means of liquid tolerance, I really do love them. I believe them to be the other pieces of my weird and quirky puzzle.

Even when those pieces stick or fail to cooperate or whine incessantly about having to walk when we can cab the five blocks to the restaurant; but “no” they will stubbornly not change out of their stupidly high (but still fabulous) heels. Even then the pieces can be forced together in an irrefutable fit. In the end, the picture always comes together. It always holds, and in many irreplaceable ways I am better off and eternally grateful for it. For my sisters—those lovable, badass bitches.

20 Comments

    • jacquelineannemarielarkin says

      Thank you so much! You are the best and I appreciate your thoughtful and encouraging comments, always. I’m a fan of your book reviews and look forward to reading more!

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Well written. I have two sisters and even in my 40’s . .we have our tensions and sometimes our times of shunning. By the way, Lauren Hill AND Bon Jovi. . are both bad ass!

    Liked by 1 person

    • jacquelineannemarielarkin says

      Haha, a very valid point, Sylvia Jo! Thank you so much for reading.

      Like

  2. raindropsdaily says

    I have two daughters and I always pray that they’d still love each other no matter how many times they pulled each other’s hair. Sisters are precious and if you have one, you’re SO lucky (says someone who has none)

    Liked by 1 person

    • jacquelineannemarielarkin says

      It’s so true. I used to envy my friends who only had brothers, but then realized it was a “grass is always greener” scenario, because similarly they were always telling me how fortunate I was to only have sisters.

      I think they are with the impression there is some kind of amicable, shared wardrobe situation that exists amongst sisters. Little do they know that a) there really isn’t and b) borrowed clothing amongst sisters rarely ends well (just ask my mother aka the family referee), as it usually end in a stained top and tears.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Nanayhood Chronicles says

    I have one brother and two sisters and a lot of people say I look more like my brother than my sisters. Having a brother is pretty much the same except play times are rougher, and dramas lesser. 😁 Loved your blog by the way! Looking forward to seeing more!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Great! 😀 I only have brothers, but one of my cousins are kind of like a sister since she lived with us in high school and we look so similar that people would mistake us for each other. It feels a lot stronger than other friendships 😊 Sisters are the best! 🙂

    Like

  5. Followed simply because you understand the status Ms. Lauryn Hill should have in one’s musical catalog, her personal shortcomings aside :). I have a twin sister and a younger sister, and no brothers. I think the bond of sisterhood whether by blood or not is like none other! My twin sister and I share a closer bond (I think obviously but I have met some twins that fight like cats and dogs), but some of my chosen sisters and I have the best relationships of all, that withstand fights over stolen property or words said too quickly. I enjoyed reading this!

    Liked by 1 person

    • jacquelineannemarielarkin says

      Thank you so much for your comment, Sherraine! I’m so glad you found the post relatable and that you enjoyed reading it. I also love that you appreciate and understand the amazing musicianship and well deserved accolades of Ms. Lauryn Hill.

      I checked out your blog and must say that I am so impressed by both its engaging and insightful subject matter and your aptitude for writing.

      I look forward to connecting with you further in the WP realm!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I love this 😀 I couldn’t relate to the silent treatment bit, but that was mostly because whenever I have tried to give it to my sister I would generally forget and speak to her within about 20 minutes, only realising later that I wasn’t meant to have! But I love your style of writing, it’s very engaging for sure.

    Liked by 1 person

    • That is hilarious. Honestly, I’ve done the same thing with my sisters. Particularly, when it seemed far more pressing to bridge the divide and ask if they wanted to watch a movie with me rather than continue stonewalling them with silence.

      I’m glad to hear you enjoyed the post and thank you for the wonderful compliments!

      Like

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